memories

Spent the weekend looking at different paint colors for Sari's room. And doing other stuff. Found myself getting even more confused about who I was... at least in relation to Kairos and Verra.

So, I'm writing this down, just incase I forget.

I never fell in love with Verra. I met her when I tumbled into her laundry basketl; bruised myself rather good. Spent a couple of weeks recupperating in her village. Talking and hanging out with her. Helping her doing stuff around the village. I didn't know she was a dragon. I just ended up finding more and more excuses to stay around, to not leave her. I just some how came to the decision that I wasn't going to leave her. I wanted to be around her forever and go where she went. So I asked her to come with me. To be with me forever.

And she said yes.


I did fall in love with Kairos. I knew I was in love with him when I ran into him... or into his representation in Teena's mind. I saw him in a dark room huddled in a corner craddling his arm. I wanted to go to him and comfort him right then. Tell him that everything was going to be okay. And he looked at me in fear and told me that he never wanted to see me again, that he hated me. And my heart wrenched. I wanted to tell him that I loved him, but I couldn't say it outloud... it was too dangerous. But I remembered the Princess Bride, of all things, and how Westley kept on telling Buttercup "As you wish" which really meant "I love you". So I told him, "As you wish."