That was fun

It's one thing really to have hang ups about certain things, whether it be from just not liking it or past trauma. It's another thing all together to discover you have a hang up that you didn't know about because the bastard who gave you the hang up blocked it from your memory and it didn't resurface until you did it not knowing that well hey, you had a traumatic experinces with it and then have all the past experinces go flooding back into your head at one time.

I think Jono did that on purpose. A sort of "if he can't have fun with me then no one else can" thing.

I still don't know a lot of what he did to me. He just kinda wiped it from my mind. The only thing I really know was that he liked using knives... it's kinda hard to hide the scars. I guess he figured if I didn't remember I wouldn't be afraid to come back.

Which was true.

I did keep on going back to him. For four fucking years I went back for him.

I remember reading somewhere... I don't remember where... that rape victims sometimes become sex addicts or sex phobics. I guess in my case I'm the former. Would explain alot.

Oh, Frank, if you're reading this, you don't need to go hunting for him. I killed him myself. First person I ever killed.


Anyway, on another note... Have to start planning the New Year's party. Need lots of bubbly.

Could do with some bubbly now.

Meme

Jung Explorer Test
Actualized type: ENFP
(who you are)

ENFP - "Journalist". Uncanny sense of the motivations of others. Life is an exciting drama. 8.1% of total population.

Preferred type: ENFP
(who you prefer to be)

ENFP - "Journalist". Uncanny sense of the motivations of others. Life is an exciting drama. 8.1% of total population.

Attraction type: ENFP

(who you are attracted to)

ENFP - "Journalist". Uncanny sense of the motivations of others. Life is an exciting drama. 8.1% of total population.

Take Jung Explorer Test
personality tests by similarminds.com