Dec. 10th, 2004

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I feel good. I feel better than I have in a long time. It's a weird feeling. I don't think I've ever been in a relationship with a guy where I've felt like this before. Where I've wanted them. I really really really want Kai. I don't need him, I just want him.

Jono... well he wanted me for some unknown reason and didn't really give me a choice in if I wanted to be with him.

Lorac was always a matter of need really. We need each other even though we're not good for each other. And life sucks but that's that.

Corry was... well I hate to admit it, he was rebound. But we're friends now. Drinking buddies too.

Kairos is mine. And I'm his. And everything is good and happy and wonderful and I feel so odd being so happy and in love I haven't felt like this since Verra. I still feel like this when I'm with Verra but I didn't think I could feel like this with anyone else. I've been extending/rewinding my days so I can spend as much time as I can with both of them and still do the things I need to get done.

Teena was right. We are a sappy pair of lovebirds.


Now if only I can get the computer to stop playing Christmas carols non stop.

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Alec Troven

August 2021

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